How to Make a Guest List Without Offending Anyone (Yes, It’s Possible)
The day you decide to start creating your guestlist is the day you find out just how crazy your family is...
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Cos it's never just writing down names.
So if you’ve been stuck trying to make your guest list “fair” without stepping on toes (...or blowing your budget)
This post is for you.
I'm going to give you 5 Simple tips to help you create a Guestlist that you'll love while still maintaining peace and your budget.
1. Start With Your Inner Circle
The easiest way to cut through the noise is to focus on the people who actually matter most.
Ask yourself:
“If I was crying in a bathroom at 2am, who would I want there handing me tissues?
That’s your core group.
The non-negotiables.
The people who love you, show up for you, and would dance with you no matter what song is playing.
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✓ Who makes the cut:
Immediate family, lifelong friends, your VIPs.
✗ Who doesn’t:
People you haven’t spoken in 1 year and weren't even planning on doing so anytime soon.
People who will honestly stress you if they are there.
2. Use the “Would They Invite You?” Test
I'm not usually about being petty and "giving energy back" ...all that kind of stuff
But in this case you do have to ask yourself ...
"If they were getting married would i be invited? "
If the answer is No, then why are you sweating over putting them on your guest list?
Reciprocity is a beautiful thing ...use it.
3. Blame the Venue... (Even If It’s a Lie)
Let me bless you with one of the oldest tricks in the wedding book.
When someone asks why they weren’t invited, say,
“Oh my gosh, I wish we could invite more people, but our venue only fits [insert convenient, slightly low number].”
Even if your venue is literally a football field, they don’t need to know that.
Alternative scapegoats include:
- “Budget constraints” (always works)
- “Keeping it intimate”
- “Fire code restrictions” (because nobody argues with safety laws)
4. Create A, B, and C Lists
This is how you invite the right people without overcommitting:
✔ A-List: Your must-have guests (family, besties, VIPs).
They get the first round of invites
✔ B-List: People you’d love to invite if space allows (fun coworkers, long-distance cousins).
Hold off on inviting them until A-listers start declining.
✔ C-List: These are people you don’t have space for but still appreciate ...distant relatives, acquaintances, or that friend you kinda keep in touch with on Instagram.
No invite, just a wedding announcement later.
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Don’t send all your invites at once.
Space them out.
When someone RSVPs no, quietly move someone from the B-list up.
No one will ever know.
5. Be Smart With Plus-Ones
Not everyone needs a plus-one.
Easiest way to handle it (...obviously adjust it to what feels right with you).
- Married? ✓ Gets a plus-one.
- Engaged or long-term partner? ✓ Gets a plus-one.
- Been dating for three months? ✗ Nope, sorry.
- Your single introvert friend who might feel lonely at the wedding? ✗ Yeah maybe.
6.) The “Parent Ticket” Rule
Your parents will try to sneak in extra guests ....childhood friends, distant cousins, their favorite barista.
They will tell you it’s “just a few people,” which is code for 10 ...minimum
And honestly if they are contributing financially it is fair for them to have some input
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But....
I always advice;
✓ Give each parent a set number of “tickets” (e.g., “Mom, you get four spots. Choose wisely.”).
✓ Once they hit their limit, that’s it.
They make the tough calls, not you.
This way, they feel included, but your guest list stays under control.
7. Finally, remember “Nobody Cares As Much As You Think”
Most people don’t care if they’re not invited as much as you think they do.
They’ll be momentarily offended yes, then they’ll move on with their lives.
And if they don’t?
That’s a them problem.
At the end of the day, your wedding is about you and your partner, not managing everyone else’s feelings.
So make your list, set your boundaries.
... and trust that the right people will understand
Before I conclude...
If you’re struggling with tracking your guest lists.
I have something that might help.
Actually, scratch that ...I know it’ll help.
It’s my Wedding Planning Bundle
And one of the many things that it does is ...helping you with the tracking and storing of your guest list.
And like i said it's not only guest list tracking ...it will also help you with so many other different things.
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So if you're planning your wedding on your own …this is really a must.
If you want to grab it, I dropped the link below:
Let's wrap this uppp
At the end of the day, making a guest list isn’t about pleasing everyone.
It’s about celebrating with the people who truly matter.
And those who love you?
They’ll get it.
And the ones who don’t?
Well, that’s one less dinner to pay for.💃
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Just know when to set good boundaries and be true with yourself.
you got this okay💕...
And i'll see you in my next post
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Byeeeeee💗
(If you found this blog post helpful, don't forget to *SAVE THIS PIN* so you can come back to it again later)
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